My mother and a few others recommended keeping a diary on my person and writing in it as a form of de-stressing. So earlier this month, I purchased a small notebook and I have began to write my thoughts in it. Looking back on my stream of conscious is rather amusing, so I thought I would share some highlights:

Found a note in the math lab, it contains a quote by someone named after spit.

-Saliva! xoxoxo

How heavy is my backpack anyway?

56.4 Lbs apparently.

"It's like hitting a horse, eventually you give up!"

Onward! To victory, ruin, and cucumber sandwiches!

I don't understand Theodore Roosevelt saying "It's da bomb," as used as advertisement for the college bar.

The crowd was a sea of murmurs and a half-dead trumpet played from the ceiling.

He's the guest lecturer, not the guest lecher.

Think tanks! Use anti-tank dogs!

I'm leaving, so I win!

Xenophobia, run!

The Secretary of Defense is a white elephant.

There's democracy in my shorts.

Pretty lights.

Rewind Moscow!

Congress says: La la la la!

Internally constant, but seriously flawed.

Save the whales!

America has lint.

Don't kill him, he owes me money.

Nice F-16, but where will we put it?

Don't panic until I tell you to!

Je ne comprend pas.

Je suis au nord-ouest.

Don't be sad plasticine people.

Bento Macaroni

I went deaf briefly, that was both odd and frightening.

Quoting dictators is a terrible way to make friends.

It is an easy enough thing to find someone who is relatively average; however, to find someone who is completely average in all possible aspects is, at the very least, statistically unlikely.

Diaphragm!

-Jess